"All wrapped up inside her mind.."

lately things have changed.. A LOT. i miss marshall.. i miss my friends. but most of all i miss not having all this junk wrapped up in my mind. i cant just look to my side and say something to my best friend anymore. i feel like im just storing all this junk up in my mind.. i feel like im running away. i have so much to say, so im just storing it up in my mind.. im losing my mind. i imagine what the conversations would be like. what i would say and how holly would reply. i hardly get to talk to her anymore.. my shadows are changing, because my heart is changing. i dont like it.. i want to change it.. im going to church tomorrow morning. i know it wont be the same at going to Hillcrest, but I know God will lead me to what he wants.. i just hope i get over this. i want my shadows to stay the same.

God has a reason for everything.

Recently I've come across a singer/songwriter that i really like. Johnny Strat. His songs are really inspirational to me. One, Lose to Win, has really been on my mind lately, especially with the move. In the song, one line says, "This is not the end, cause now I know, Sometimes you have to lose.. to win." and I've been thinking about that a lot.. Ive been so angry about leaving Marshall, that I havn't been keeping myself open to new opportunities. Sometimes you DO have to lose to win, and it doesn't always seem like it is going to turn out right, but it does. God knows what is going to happen. He never gives you more than you can handle. I know sometimes it may seem like it is to much to handle, but in reality, you WILL pull through it. You have to be open to new things, even if they are hard. I've had friends tell me that following their dream is to hard, so they guess its not worth it. God never said that things would be east. The things that are worth it, are the ones that ARE gonna be hard to achieve. If it's easy to get, then anyone can do it.

Don't let anything pass you by.

Two weeks ago I moved. Back to my hometown, New Orleans. I've realized in these past two weeks that I regret letting so many wonderful opportunities pass me by, no matter what they may have been. I've learned to live in the moment. Don't let anything that you want pass you by, you'll most likely end up regretting letting it pass. It hurts knowing I waited for a perfect moment. The perfect moment came, and I didn't take it when I had the amazing chance. So don't do anything you'll regret. And don't not do something because you are scared, because you WILL regret not doing it. Then you will live life wondering what could have and would have been, and not being able to do anything about it. Think about this. If it doesn't make sense to you now, it will later on. I promise. =)